After separation, it is natural for parents to want to know where their child is when they are spending time with the other parent. But does a parent have a legal right to know exactly where their child is, who they are with and what they are doing?
The answer is generally no, unless it has been ordered by the court. Parenting arrangements are often a matter of communication and cooperation between parents, rather than a requirement to report every detail of a child’s time with the other parent.
What does parental responsibility mean?
Parental responsibility is the legal responsibility for making important decisions about a child. Depending on the circumstances, this can include decisions about education, healthcare, religion and where a child lives.It is granted to the mother automatically and to the father if he is named on the birth certificate, was married to the mother at the time of the birth, or has been granted by the court.
Having parental responsibility does not necessarily mean that a parent has the right to know every detail of what happens during the other parent’s time with the child. Equally, a parent should generally not use child arrangements as an opportunity to exclude the other parent unnecessarily.
The starting point should be sensible communication and a focus on the child’s welfare.
What information should parents share?
This will depend on the child’s age, circumstances and the arrangements that have been agreed. It may be sensible for parents to tell each other where the child will be staying, particularly if they are travelling away from home or staying somewhere unfamiliar.
Parents may also agree to provide contact details, information about significant changes to arrangements or details of who will be caring for the child if the parent is unavailable.
However, parenting does not usually require one parent to account for every activity during their time with the child. Children benefit from having a positive relationship with both parents, and coparenting works best when each parent is able to enjoy their time with the child without unnecessary interference.
What if parents cannot agree?
Disagreements about information-sharing can quickly become a source of conflict after separation. Family mediation can provide a useful way of resolving these issues.
At Hampshire Mediation, parents can discuss practical arrangements and agree how information about their children will be shared. This might include agreeing what information should be provided, when it should be provided and how parents will communicate.
The aim is not to give one parent control over the other, but to create clear child arrangements that work for the whole family and, most importantly, meet the child’s needs.